For the longest time you stare at the amount they'd written down, desperate for the money and work, but the thought of getting nude in front of a crowd has your heart thumping so hard it's practically climbing out your throat.
"I... I can't," you blurt, and feel your dreams crashing about you. They start to speak, saying things like how disappointed they are, what a waste of time it was, and how you weren't right for the part anyway. You barely hear them as you rush out of the room half-dressed, fleeing out the building and onto the sidewalk, still adjusting your clothes.
If everything has a trigger this seems to be the one for your downward slide. While you attend any and all auditions religiously after that you find that they all go worse than that one. You just can't get the humiliating audition out of your mind and find yourself making one slip-up after another, suffering one rejection after another.
By the end of the month you have enough money for either rent or food and choose the food, skulking past your landlord's door every day as you head out to more auditions that you know won't bear fruit.
"All this because I was too scared to take my clothes off," you mourn.
Until one day something happens... |